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Gendered language and why it matters

Gendered language and why it matters

Last year I proofread a children’s illustrated dictionary for a client. There was a double-page spread with pictures of boys and girls dressed for different professions. There were camera operators, ministers, nurses (girls), doctors (mainly boys), firemen (boys), and policewomen (girls). And this is why gendered language matters.

Sometimes when I’m working, my Spidey senses tingle before I’ve checked something. This was one of those times. Through training and reading Ciep’s guide to gendered language, I recognised the need to raise a query.

The State of Gendered Language

Sue Grey (developmental editor at O’Reilly Media) wrote an excellent article for the Ciep entitled The State of Gendered Language. She details how the world seems to be changing at an ever quicker pace. In some areas, this change is positive such as a reduction in sexism, homophobia, and transphobia but with every advancement, there is an inevitable backlash.

The powerful rarely relinquish without a fight. Controlling language is another way to control people. Women’s rights and freedoms are being threatened and eroded as a reaction to women’s advancement in the workplace and positions of power. The same is true of those from the LGBTQ+ community whose rights are being repealed and lives endangered just as many people become more accepting of difference.

Moving away from sexism

Gendered language is a contentious issue with many people. It follows that language needs to keep pace with society and adapt to better reflect its citizens.

Challenges to sexism in language began in the 1960s and 1970s. One of the first examples of this change was the wide acceptance of he and she rather than deferring to the male pronoun. From this we had the introduction of Ms to further support women.

Meanwhile, women were taking to the streets in their thousands demanding equal pay, paid childcare, and rights over their bodies. At the same time, gays, and other activists were asking to be recognised and treated with respect.

Simultaneously, people began to believe that descriptive titles needn’t be gendered. They asked questions such as do we need to gender the job description. Do we need to know if the person performing a role is male or female? If the answer is no, which is invariably is, then get rid of the gender label. Finding a gender-neutral alternative is easy.

Ooh look! It’s a male scientist!

There is a fantastic satirical page on Facebook, Man who has it all, who parodies the ridiculous advice self-help books, and the media, dole out to women. He tackles the prejudice of gendered language head on. In one post there is a photo of a male and female side by side; his t-shirt reads Male scientist whereas hers simply reads – scientist.

Essentially, the point being made illustrates that gendered labels are unnecessary. They help reinforce unhelpful stereotypes around gender roles: we don’t need policewomen, firemen, or postwomen. By gendering jobs, you are implying that the default is a male in that position.

Furthermore, it helps people assume that for someone not of that gender to perform that role is exceptional. This is especially evident when discussing certain career paths such as a male nurse or a female surgeon.

Some people may argue that there are greater challenges in the world to be concerned about but this is an important issue. There are many societies where women are still restricted from entering certain professions. And language whether overtly or not plays a role in societies expectations.

So, when we eradicate unhelpful gender labels, we are helping young people grow up with the expectation that all roles are open to them. That to be a physicist, politician, or CEO is possible however they identify.

We’ve eliminated gendered language – so we’ve won!

Sadly, we are not even close. While gender labels are being removed from English, there are still unhelpful stereotypes and examples of how language can be weaponised. Boys criticised for being sensitive and girls who are leaders labelled bossy are two such examples.

Issues with language and how different genders are spoken to persist. Politicians get asked questions that produce eye rolls on a regular basis. When Jacinda Arden and Finnish prime minister Sana Marin met last year, one male journalist fell short.

With a straight face, he asked two elected leaders of their respective countries if they were ‘meeting because you’re similar in age, and, you know, got a lot of common stuff?’

Arden countered with if he’d ever ask Barack Obama and John Key the same question. Meanwhile, Marin gave the withering reply, ‘We’re meeting because we’re prime ministers.’ The asinine nature of this question highlights that as a female you can lead your country yet still be undermined by someone talking to you as if you’re a teenager having a sleepover.

There are many other examples of how language is gendered or othered. Othering can also be noted by absence, sometimes research is conducted with only cis-gendered white men. Outcomes from this myopic view are still being felt among women and other disenfranchised groups.

When we other groups and only let one voice dominate, is it any wonder that many of us feel abandoned by institutions and locked out of policy. That’s why gendered language matters.

Sensitivity as a proofreader and editor

Part of the role of an editor is to help your clients understand accepted language usage and point out diplomatically when their writing could be amended. It’s fine, we all make mistakes and have our biases which is why checking your own writing can lead to issues as we are often unable to see our own ticks and bad habits.

That’s why hiring a good editor will help you avoid pitfalls and help to ensure readers don’t feel excluded.

As an editor, it is your job to be the widest audience for any discourse and advise your clients accordingly. Showing sensitivity promotes inclusion and that is what all writing should aim for.

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Bionic Reading: what is it and does it work?

Bionic Reading: what is it and does it work? When I think of bionic images of Barbarella, BSG and Star Wars come to mind. As an adjective, bionic is attributed to sci-fi often relating to a replaced body part which enhances the strength and ability of a character: think of The Bionic Woman.

Bionic Reading: faster and better?

Bionic Reading is designed to enhance our ability to read at greater speed, yet still retain the text’s meaning. If it works, the implications are staggering. Learning new skills would be easier; children could learn to read more advanced books with greater ease; work would feel less stressful. We would become more efficient – more like machines.

Who created Bionic Reading?

Renato Casutt a Swedish typographic designer created Bionic Reading. He claims Bionic Reading accelerates the speed at which you read with no loss of comprehension. At first glance, it looks intriguing, but I wonder if everybody could benefit from this. Is this beneficial or nothing more than a publicity stunt for a new typeface?

How does it work?

Apparently, Bionic Reading supports how our brains process information faster than our eyes. Initial letters and syllables are highlighted, so we can increase the speed at which we read.

Previously, I discussed how our brains make assumptions about words based on the initial letters of a word. So, even if letters within a word are transposed our brains fill in the blanks and help us to read.

On the official site they claim, ‘Bionic Reading revises texts so that the most concise parts of words are highlighted. This guides the eye over the text and the brain remembers previously learned words more quickly.’

Reading more quickly sounds desirable especially coupled without losing comprehension but there could be downsides.

Bionic Reading is a gift to copy editors

When I first saw posts about Bionic Reading on Twitter earlier this year, my interest was piqued. This could become an essential part of my toolkit or an unwanted distraction leading to more errors in my copy.

As a proofreader and copy editor, I go through many stages before I can send copy back to a client satisfied that I’ve managed to find most errors.

Initially, I skim copy to understand overall tone and meaning of a piece. Then I go back to check titles, subheadings, headers and footers, page numbers, tables and so on. Following my initial skim and scan and other checks, I may start to use the find and replace function for a phrase or word which is misspelt or easily confused with another.

Only then, will I read through the copy checking and making amendments as necessary and raising queries with clients. There is a lot more to my job than this, but you get the idea.

It seems that Bionic Reading could help with a lot of aspects of my job. Well, up to a point. As a confident reader, it would support with the overall meaning of a text. However, I can see several issues.

In my professional role, I have to slow down and ensure I have considered every word carefully. Has the client used a near word and got a little confused? Are letters transposed so meaning is unclear?

There are many homophones that start with the same letter(s) or syllables which you could misread. English is a wonderful but complex language, and many words are easily confusable such as effect and affect/practise (verb) and practice (noun).

Who could struggle with this and where is the evidence that supports it?

If I were to present information, as I have many times in a classroom, this could be useful. Although, many established teachers are generally confident of their subject or speciality and can deliver lessons scanning notes rather than reading aloud.

Working as a proofreader or editor would make me pause before employing Bionic Reading on a text.

Emergent readers could become distracted and struggle. When we first learn to read, we look for digraphs and phonemes we know to help us read words. The assumptive nature of Bionic Reading would make this difficult.

My first impression is not positive. My eyes are distracted by the initial letters in bold and I can’t concentrate. Neurodivergent people may find this challenging, especially individuals with dyslexia.

I have read accounts of some with ADHD who love Bionic Reading, but this is not a whole community.

Several editors and teachers I spoke to were concerned with the lack of evidence that Bionic Reading enhances reading in the way it claims on its website.

I took a test that showed my reading speed increased by only 1% with Bionic Reading, so that increase is a token amount.

What’s the rush?

It is possible to speed read, but most find that when they do this, they have a sense of writing but miss nuance. They may also struggle to later recall what they have read. Reading slowly tends to help us retain what we’ve read.

As someone who finds it challenging to relax, I find reading therapeutic. I use it as a form of mediation: something slow, peaceful and calming. The wonder of how an author creates atmosphere, paints a scene and takes you deep into a character’s pysche is something to savour.

Rolling around an unfamiliar word or elegant phrase in my mind is something I love to take my time over. I want to enjoy every word like the last spoonful of a delicious dessert. So, Bionic Reading is not for me.

If more in depth studies are carried out and verified, I may change my mind. When teachers, writers and others are onboard I will be willing to look again but for now – it’s not for me.

Neurotypical people may thrive with Bionic Reading, but for everyone else – the jury’s out.

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Stop the noise: how writing can calm the mind

Diary and daily planner with important list items written laid open on a black stone background.

How writing can calm the mind

Writing can calm the mind and untangle overlapping thoughts. My brain functions in the same way a noisy party does; there are lots of conversations happening at once. I listen to all of them, and focus on none of them which leaves me overwhelmed and exhausted.

What was I saying?

As you can imagine, this can be tiring for me and everyone else. My husband gets frustrated when I begin talking to him halfway through a story or sentence. Sometimes, I feel hurt when he hasn’t joined in or given me an appropriate response. Then I focus and see the confused look on his face.

I have found the way to quiet and organise my thoughts is to focus and write them down.

A to-do list to help organise mind chaos

To start with, I write a to-do list in my time management book. But my list is what I like to call inclusive. Some items on my list are so insignificant that other people wouldn’t bother to write them down, but I must or I will forget.

My friend Rachel told me about her ta-da! list. This includes all that she has achieved that day. Psychologically, this makes perfect sense. It can help you feel motivated for mundane tasks, and there is satisfaction in striking items from the list.

I have started to include ta-da items on my to-do list, and, I must admit, it is very satisfying.

Hardcopy diaries don’t need to be charged to work

As well as a to-do list, I keep a diary. I admire the many who use diaries on their phones with colour-coded calendars. All the families’ activities are organised and can be accessed within three taps.

However, I like pen and paper. It makes me feel physically calmer and in control when I write things down. I feel it helps me remember more easily. At least, that’s what I tell myself.

My diary is a gorgeous purple perfect-bound book with gold embossed print. It has individual tabs for each month and soothes me with its clear, calm typeface.

My diary is a record of work I have completed, appointments and includes impending deadlines for clients. I’m not a total luddite as I also have a working document on my laptop.

Writing to manage obtrusive thoughts

If I need to focus my mind, I write. Writing down my thoughts and ideas helps me get them out of my head. This is a technique recommended for improving mental health for a long time.

In my previous life as a teacher, I always kept a notebook beside my bed.

When I woke in the night, I reached for my notebook and a scalpel-sharp HB pencil. It’s just not the same writing with a soft point.

Then I’d scribble away like Veronica Sawyer from Heathers in her monocle until the tornado of my mind was lulled into quiet. My heartbeat slowed and I would sink back into my pillows.

On waking, I read through my spider-like scrawl to decipher what had been so urgent that it had interrupted my sleep – again. Often, I was updating records, planning a parent call, or thinking of a child whose issues needed more attention.

Teaching is a wonderful job, but the admin can be overwhelming. Especially when everything you do is classed as urgent. Writing helped relieve the worries in my mind and allowed me to feel calmer.

Writing as a form of meditation

Freewriting is great for capturing fragments of dreams before they slip from your consciousness. That’s why you write first thing in the morning.

This takes longer to get into as a habit and relies on being strict with yourself about getting up in the morning. Apparently, it takes 100 hours of repeating something before it becomes fixed. I’m not there yet, but when I do manage to write in the morning my mind feels clearer.

Occasionally, these fragments can be reviewed and spun into stories.

Journaling

Since I became ill last year, journaling has been part of my recovery. In March, a friend suggested I document all the hospital visits and operations I’d had. This was as a record and a permanent reminder that I’m far more resilient than I thought. Who knows it could become my answer to the misery memoir, but with a lighter touch!

Expressive journaling can be very therapeutic.

At my lowest, I found writing really helped to make sense of what I was going through. I was reading a lot of Marian Keyes at the time, and I’m sure some of my entries are derivative of her confessional style. If you’re going to imitate anyone, Keyes is a good place to start.

Playing with words

And words. Words are everything. I enjoy how some words feel in my mouth when I form them. I love seeing the effect they have on other people. Sometimes, I use them to shock or offend. Often I use them to try to get people to laugh.

It’s a hang-up of being the middle child. Make them laugh, so they’ll hear you. Sometimes it works; other times it doesn’t.

What to eradicate from writing

Like most writers, I could benefit from a good editor. As with many of us, I tend to overwrite.

I’m a fan of True Crime podcasts, and from this I have learnt that killers familiar with their victims tend to overkill. I do this with my writing. Now and then when I’m trying to impress someone or I’m nervous I use a word to convince them I’m clever. What I notice about good writing is how economical it can be.

Good writers understand the point of writing is communication with the reader. If you can be understood without confusion, you’ve succeeded.

Most of my writing is just for me and that’s fine.

Writing can help calm your mind. Try it and see.

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Ikigai: The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life

Modern life is toxic

Ikigai The Japanese Secret to a Long and Happy Life intrigued me from the title. By the time I read this book by Hector Garcia and Francesco Moralles, it was an international bestseller.

Notice your surroundings

Two months ago, I rediscovered ikigai which had been languishing, unloved in my book pile. Someone else needed to unlock the secret to a long and happy life that Ikigai might provide. So, it was time for me to return this book to my good friend.

Be aware of how things look and feel

After a feverish three hours, I sat back and considered how I might incorporate the principles of ikigai into my life. The soothing powder blue cover covered in blossom and strong typeface drew me in. At a little bigger than the size of an adult female hand, the book felt light and accessible.

Why have I dedicated so much attention to the details of the look and feel of this book? Because one of the guiding principles of ikigai is to stay in the moment: dedicating yourself to whatever it is you are doing and completing your task to the best of your ability.

This can be something as simple as taking notice of the look, feel, and weight of a book before reading it.

Long life and the inhabitants of Okinawa

‘According to the Japanese, everyone has an ikigai – what a French philosopher might call a raison d’etre.‘ Nowhere is this more evident than in the inhabitants of Okinawa. Garcia and Moralles spent time in Japan and visited Okinawa ‘where there are 24.55 people over the age of 100 for every 100 000 people.’

This extraordinary statistic prompted the authors to investigate why this might be, and how others could adapt their lifestyles for themselves. Health and happiness typify those in Ogimi, a town on the island of Okinawa. These people have the greatest life expectancy in the world.

Why is this? What makes the citizens of Ogimi more likely to outlive the average person elsewhere? Are there any secrets, or should we practise behaviours we know can benefit our health? I was eager to find out the answers to these questions after struggling with my own health.

Japanese citizens and retirement

As hinted at previously, Ikigai is about living with purpose. As evidenced in Japan, the concept of retirement does not really exist. One could argue that this (in part) is due to the lack of state support.

Further to this, living space in Japan is at such a premium that multi-generational households are the norm. Therefore, to keep occupied all the time means you are not spending as much time with your family. In some cases, I’m sure this is a relief. In addition, the cost of living is high so many might not feel able to retire.

Anecdotal evidence

When I lived in Japan, I witnessed how everyone, no matter their role, approached it with a purpose and dedication I have not seen elsewhere. From fast-food servers, train conductors, musicians, and sensais, all were immaculately dressed, greeted you with quiet calm, and focused on their job with precision and poise. It was a humbling experience.

What is the meaning behind the kanji?

The kanji (Japanese writing system based on Chinese characters) for ikigai breaks down to mean ‘life’ and ‘to be worthwhile‘. According to the book, everyone has an ikigai deep inside them but finding it can require a lot of work.

Some people, especially those in Ogimi, believe following your life’s purpose and pursuing it is why we get up in the morning. Over time your ikigai can change, but you need to seek out what it is and ensure it becomes part of your daily life.

Perhaps this is why I felt this from Japanese citizens when I lived there.

Practical advice: how to find your ikigai

Some of the advice in this book is common sense, but it is good to give yourself a reminder to help you reinforce the message.

Under current circumstances, following this advice is easier for some than others. Firstly, you need to eat well and, if possible, eat a well-balanced diet. Following on from food is exercise. Again, this isn’t earth-shattering, but it is worth bearing in mind how much our mental well-being is connected to our physical health.

Another piece of advice is to find your purpose and pursue it. Finally, the idea of developing and maintaining strong social ties with friends and family. In a Covid world, it can be hard to maintain relationships that may have languished over repeated enforced lockdowns and stay-at-home orders.

We are all slowly emerging from our shells, some more hesitant than others, blinking into the light. Be kind is a sentiment we can all get behind and if your close ties feel precarious try to strengthen them.

Further on in this book, the authors discuss how modern life is lived at such a frantic pace ‘and a nearly constant state of competition.’ People want and think they need, a job with higher status, or a bigger salary, a grander home, more holidays, and more possessions. And this more, more, more mantra will make us happy.

While these pursuits may elevate our state of mind, the effects are transitory. Other activities we engage in can bring us temporary joy but are often harmful. Especially activities such as drinking too much alcohol, gambling, or excessive shopping which provide an immediate dopamine hit but not a long-lasting high.

Other techniques explored in the book

Unquestionably, the advice given so far seems obvious. Further in the book, the authors discuss how to live better for longer we need to adopt a more stoic attitude. For the same reason, we need to maintain serenity in the face of a setback. One way to do this is to engage in logotherapy which reframes mental struggles as spiritual anguish as opposed to illness.

The distinction may seem subtle, but it is a way to see ourselves as wrangling with our spirituality rather than being ill which can only be treated by pills.

Viktor Frankl: the founder of logotherapy

Viktor Frankl was a prisoner at Auschwitz where he witnessed appalling cruelty and suffered inhumane treatment. How was he able to survive such torment? On arrival, he had all his research notes confiscated which he planned to turn into a book.

His desire, or ikigai, was to work as a therapist upon his release. This desire gave him a reason to live and something to get up for every day. Whenever he had the chance, he would scavenge scraps of paper and write all of his notes again from memory. This readied him for the day he was set free and gave him hope and focus for the future.

Shoma Morita

Next, the book deals with the work of Shoma Morita and the therapy he developed. Firstly, you need to accept your feelings. He likened feelings to the weather: you cannot predict or control them merely observe them. Feelings pass over you like clouds on a summer’s day.

Secondly, you need to do what you should be doing. This sounds simple, yet most find this difficult advice to follow. Many people are trapped in jobs they despise which grind them down and rob them of joy. If they can find a way to monetize joy, they can find purpose and life will be easier and more pleasurable.

Have a job that is too easy, and you will disengage and get bored. Challenging jobs can fulfill us, so we can create flow that makes life easier. However, if we are working beyond our capabilities, we will suffer from anxiety.

Some of this advice seems like a luxury. To be able to work in a field we desire, at a level that provides a challenge without stress seems beyond many jobs. Many people have limited resources or access to work due to circumstances including caring responsibilities. I would argue that, on average, women have fewer choices than men. Therefore, it would seem women are less likely to have flow in their lives due to the emotional burdens they shoulder.

Achieving flow through focus

Another way to improve our lives, if we cannot change jobs, is to focus on one thing at a time. This, according to Morita, could be the single most important factor in achieving flow.

For example, if you are reading a book, you should focus on the words on the page. If you are writing an article, you need to discipline yourself to research thoroughly and then write without distraction.

All of these suggestions are great in theory, but many of them rely on the privilege of space and money.

Better health in Ogimi, Okinawa

So, how do the inhabitants of Ogimi manage to live such long and happy lives? Japanese people, in general, practise hara hachi bu, a custom dating from the twelfth century that prescribes eating until nearly full. Ogimians practise tai-chi daily. Tai-chi is credited with slowing the development of osteoporosis and Parkinson’s, increasing circulation, and improving muscle tone and flexibility.

This is great news for those of us who prefer our exercise to be on the gentler end of the scale rather than pounding pavements.

From their extensive research, Garcia and Miralles conclude that adopting elements of stoicism, Buddhism, and ikigai into our lives will improve them.

Finally, they encourage you to be led by your curiosity and keep busy doing things that fill you with meaning and happiness.

My ikigai is communication – what’s yours?

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Aphantasia: being unable to see with the mind’s eye

Black and white sketch of woman with aphantasia
Woman with her eyes closed with an empty thought bubble above her head.

Aphantasia: being unable to see with the mind’s eye is a condition that has gained recognition over the last twenty years. Aphantasia and blind imagination affect an as yet unknown number of people in the population. This may lead you to believe it is a new discovery, but you would be wrong.

Aristotle

As with many concepts, Aristotle first proposed Phantasia as a sixth sense referring to our ability to picture with our mind what we cannot see. He was fascinated with the nature and properties of the soul and the power of thought.

Galton

Francis Galton, a polymath scientist, revived the idea of Phantasia in 1880 by conducting an investigation with some students. He asked one hundred undergraduates to picture their breakfast table and describe it. Of this group, ten claimed they had grainy or faint images in their minds, but a few said they could conjure no image whatsoever. Galton posited that this was a neurological condition but nothing further came of his theory until the 1970s.

Marks and the vividness of visual imagery

In 1973, David Marks created the Vividness of Visual Imagery (VVIQ) to measure individual differences in vividness of imagery. There have been several versions of the questionnaire since, but the results were self-reporting so any findings and conclusions drawn needed to bear this in mind.

Adam Zeman

In 2009, neurologist Adam Zeman received a 65-year-old former surveyor as a patient. This man, referred to as patient MX, found he had lost the ability to imagine following heart surgery. The case study received lots of media attention and led to many self-identifying and reporting their own blind imagination. The subject was suffering from acquired phantasia which tends to occur following depression or psychosis.

By 2015, Adam Zeman’s research included many case studies exploring blind imagination in more detail. This is when he coined the term Aphantasia to describe the inability to voluntarily create mental images in one’s mind.

In 2020, Dr. Zeman published a paper on the University of Exeter’s website entitled: Phantasia – The psychological significance of lifelong vividness extremes. The study involved a total of 2,400 participants and the results revealed some interesting findings.

Aphantasiacs struggles

Aphantasiacs struggle with some aspects of life that leave them feeling alienated. For them, facial recognition can be challenging. So, walking into a bar to meet friends could be difficult as they struggle to identify people they know well. Autobiographical memory can be hard to access for some coupled with face blindness which can lead to problems with personal relationships and friendships.

Aphantasia seems to be associated with scientific and mathematical occupations whereas Hyperphantasia, its opposite, is more closely aligned with those pursuing the creative industries. These are tendencies though and there are aphantasiacs who pursue creative careers. But the results reveal patterns, not absolutes.

Reading as therapy

The relationship between aphantasia and reading is not something I had not previously considered. When life is challenging, fiction gives me a means of escape from the darkness of the world. Modern life is stressful and with the constant intrusion of news and technology, it can be hard to switch off. Books help me do this. Reading allows the brain to reset and slow down. The feel of the pages between your fingers is meditative and the images accompanying those words ignite your pleasure senses for a dopamine hit that is accessible at all times.

Well, this is how reading is for me. My imagination is constantly constructing images.

What is reading like for those with aphantasia?

Like many conditions, aphantasia exists on a scale. My husband, for example, has a strong autobiographical memory and can recall faces yet finds reading fiction taxing. If he has seen a visual representation of a world, or character, he can use that as a guide to help him construct the world or picture those characters when he reads.

Without that visual guide, many books are difficult for him to access and enjoy. When he was younger and the class was instructed to read, he would sometimes read the dictionary as that held as much meaning for him as a book.

He persevered with reading and can now take pleasure in it but not to the extent that I do. For me it is effortless; for him focus and visual references are essential.

Aphantasiacs may struggle with reading for this reason. For them, to access the same pleasure from literature graphic novels can provide the perfect antidote.

Aphantasia and misconceptions

It would be easy to assume that those who have aphantasia cannot be creative. If they cannot picture images easily then how does that hinder the creative process? To be imaginative is to show creativity and inventiveness. Creativity is linked to a network of brain activities recalling past events to future ones and the possible. Aphantasiacs can do all this but they process creativity differently.

If you, or someone you know, struggles to visualise, there is ongoing research to help support. For more information, you can visit www.aphantasia.com.

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Great books make life better

Four books displayed on a teal table top including Girl A and The Sundown Motel
Girl A, Inch Levels, The Sundown Motel and Educated

Being ill is boring

Being ill is boring, but great books make life better. I hadn’t been feeling great for a while, but I did what many people do when they’re worried about their health: nothing. When I finally went to the doctor, I was despatched to the hospital and operated on.

Eight months later and my life has changed. Well, for the moment at least. I am no longer tearing off to school and shoving food in my mouth like a compulsive gambler filling a slot machine with coins. Instead, I’m at home, and life is much quieter.

General hospital

I’ve had several operations since my first one, but there have been some positive changes from this uncertain time. It feels like a reset; I’ve had to default to factory settings and start some things from a different perspective.

For one thing, I’ve realised that I need to take better care of myself. I ignored the neon signs and massive warnings my body was giving me.

Books heal your mind

While I was incapacitated on the sofa, I was able to indulge in one of my favourite pastimes: reading. My preferred genres are crime fiction and horror. I also love stories set in the domestic sphere which are mostly written by women. Crime and horror have many female authors too: good ones. Often they are not as celebrated as enthusiastically as their male counterparts, but that is a topic for another blog.

Reading to distract from pain

When I was on high doses of medication, I could barely move let alone think. Reading became an essential ritual of self-care. It allowed me to explore worlds and inhabit other lives. Reading helped me imagine a time when I would be well again.

Of the books I read, several stand out. Books that, despite my discomfort, I consumed within two days. One occupied me so much that I read until dawn.

Girl A

In January while floating in codeine-cushioned comfort, I read Girl A in twenty-four hours. As I was physically restricted on the sofa, I read about a family trapped by a father obsessed with his own needs to the detriment of his terrified children. Told in flashback, the story details the survival and brutal aftermath of siblings who escape their abusive home.

All the children are damaged in different ways, and they all develop different coping mechanisms for their trauma. I found it strangely comforting and full of melancholy.

Educated

Educated explores themes of endurance, redemption, and hope. A young girl lives in a state of constant anxiety; her End-of-Days-survivalist father directs his family in a grim drama of trauma, pain, and neglect. Both these books feature abusive fathers who use their physical strength and religious fervor to dominate and control their families. Their thwarted ambitions are paid for by their innocent children.

Girl A is fictitious, but it was inspired by real-life accounts of children held captive by their parents. In contrast, Educated is a memoir that is truly horrific, yet hopeful. I found both these books to be comforting when I was at my worst.

My confinement was temporary whereas these children had spent years living under tyrannical rule. It is easy to fall into self-pity when you are ill, and these two stories helped me get some perspective. I had my loving family who made every effort to comfort, help and support me.

Inch Levels

After Educated, I tackled Inch Levels. The framing device for this novel involves a young man with terminal cancer lying in a hospital bed which resonated with me. Visited by his mother, sister and brother-in-law the past slowly seeps into the present, and the toxicity of poor communication and family secrets is devastating.

A change of direction

By the middle of January, I decided I needed something lighter to divert me. Books that would comfort, intrigue, excite and scare me. I love ghost stories and horror; they both deal with controlled terror. While I was feeling scared of the world, and my own health, these books offered a distraction. They helped me adjust to my new, but hopefully, temporary existence.

The Book Club

The Book Club enveloped me like a warm blanket; I loved the cosy-crime claustrophobia of it. I have always enjoyed living in cities for the anonymity they provide. You can enjoy community without knowing everything about those on your doorstep. Mary Alice Monroe captures the dynamics of a close-knit community and the intricacies of female friendship well.

The Sundown Motel

The Sundown Motel blends two genres I am enthralled by: ghost stories and true crime. Simone St James creates an uneasy atmosphere when she abandons her protagonist, Carly Kirk, to a small town in upstate New York. She works at the reception desk at a rundown motel while trying to uncover what happened to her aunt who disappeared forty years previously.

The tension arises from the isolation and anger of some of the inhabitants of the hotel – not all of whom are alive. If you loved Pyscho and The Shining this evokes the same sense of unease, but the girl in peril is replaced with a fearless woman who won’t stop until she finds the truth. I love how the author discards the tired girl-in-terror trope and instead gives her main character agency.

The Broken Girls

After The Sundown Motel, I read another thriller by Simone St James: The Broken Girls. The story employs a time-shift element that I adore, and this time we switch between the 1950s, the 1980s, and the present day. Fiona, whose older sister was murdered at the site of an abandoned girls’ school, is dismayed to find the site is under renovation.

Who would want to bring this place back to life? Why was the school closed in the 1950s and what really happened to Fiona’s sister? This was intriguing and pacy featuring another strong, complicated woman. There are some male authors who would benefit from reading heroines like Fiona and Carly.

No Matter What

I have some friends who are in the process of growing their family. They loaned me this book to help me better understand the needs their children will have. No Matter What is a searing memoir by an adoptive mother and all the love, pain, uncertainty, turmoil, and contentment this brings for the parents and their children.

Other books I would recommend include, The Sanatorium set in the Swiss Alps which was grim and compelling; The Return: friends reunited in an isolated hotel; The Midnight Library which lived up to all the hype, and Where The Crawdads Sing which made one hospital stay much more bearable.

The Last House on Needless Street

Finally, a best-seller that I could not shake for weeks. I have an interest, some might say an unhealthy one bordering on obsession, in cats. Everything about them fills me with admiration: their utter disdain, grace, and independence among their other mystical associations. So, reading The House on Needless Street felt indulgent.

Here is a paraphrase of the blurb: This story involves murder, abduction, and a man called Ted who lives with his daughter Lauren and his cat Olivia. All of these things are true. And yet some of them are lies. I have not read a book this tightly plotted and deceptive in a very long time. Catriona Ward – you are a master storyteller.

My life has been weird, isolating, consoling, invigorating and unusual over the last year. All I know is, that great books make life better. And to all the lovely people who have been such a support. Thank you.

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Why language matters

Why does the language we use matter?

When Jewel sang, ‘I’m sensitive and I’d like to stay that way‘, I didn’t know this was every editor’s maxim. One of the most exciting aspects of language is how it is in a constant state of flux. This is why language matters.

Slang: proceed with caution

Nothing marks you out as being more desperate than when you use language that is the preserve of the young. As my fourteen-year-old would say, “Cringe!”

Am I offended?

The meaning of words develops and alters over time. What were once playground slurs, can look appallingly crass in hindsight. If I’m being honest, they probably didn’t look that great then either.

As our understanding of ourselves and each other grows, it is important to revise the language we use to refer to one another. Some argue we have become too sensitive, but it is when words are misused that we get into trouble. Most people agree that this is why language matters.

Copy editors

A good copy editor watches for these language bombs and finds a way to defuse them: tactfully.

Being different isn’t a problem; disrespecting difference is problematic

Many groups feel marginalised or misrepresented in society. For hundreds of years, power was in the hands of one dominant group: the wealthy, white, cisgender, male. They dictated everything in society from how women, the LGBTQ+ community, non-white, differently-abled, and the neurodivergent were described for as long as they held power. Some would say little has changed. This is why language matters.

Does it matter how we refer to others?

Well yes, it does. How people are described, feeds into how they are treated and helps shape their identity and sense of self-worth. There is an easy mantra to follow: if in doubt, check it out.

Archetypes are easy to use but lack nuance

This is good to bear in mind when editing anything. Always ask yourself, Who is the audience? How will this piece of copy be received? Words ascribed to people and how they are portrayed, especially in the media, favor archetypes. They act as a shorthand for the reader or viewer. That’s because it is easy to group people with aspects of their identity together in one, homogenous group, but it is lazy. It takes no effort to categorize groups in this way, but the impact felt is negative helping reinforce stereotypes.

We used to chant, “Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me.” I didn’t believe it as a child, and I don’t believe it now. Words matter – they have the power to hurt and damage.

They’re a bit sensitive

Some in the LGBTQ+ community, have reclaimed the word queer, while others, especially some older members, still recoil at memories of homophobia. There is a word that the black community has reclaimed, but it must only be used by members of that community.

This is just a snapshot of words and their power but the sentiment should remain; it is important to be sensitive when referring to groups that are not part of your lived experience.

Authenticity matters

As Louise Harnby comments in The Editing Podcast with Nick Taylor on LGBTQ+ editing, “It is about authenticity rather than sensitivity; sensitivity can imply negativity and hurt…we’re actually looking for realism.” There are voices that you should ask to check over your copy to avoid clumsy stereotypes and tired cliches.

It is important to get pronouns right, and it is becoming easier with guides appearing online and through reputable organisations, such as the Ciep.

For an informative, lively discussion on sensitivity readers with Crystal Shelley, check out episode 62 of the above-mentioned podcast.

What does this mean for the writer?

The easiest solution is to reach out to someone from the community you are writing about and ask them to read through your copy before you publish. This is easier with a novel than with a newspaper feature that, by its nature, has a short lead time.

If you don’t know anyone, and you are concerned, for example, that referring to someone with ADHD as mentally ill might be offensive: hire a sensitivity/authenticity reader to avoid any obvious pitfalls.

What does this mean for an editor?

For a fiction or non-fiction editor, it would be a query raised with the author. A gentle nudge or suggestion pointing out that what they’ve written could cause offense. Sometimes, to be offensive is the point of the writing from the perspective of a character, but it can be when someone is relying on lazy tropes they get in trouble.

How can editors challenge language?

If we are editing a newsletter, which refers to ancient inhabitants of a home we might pause to consider if this is insulting. One idea is to practise compassion and empathy. What would I think if I saw that in print and I lived in a residential home? How would I feel seeing a parent or grandparent dismissed in those terms? Consider these questions, and then make suggestions to the writer based on them. If you are a sub-editor, you probably have the power to change the words yourself without the need for consultation.

When to leave copy alone

In some circumstances, leaving controversial language in a text makes sense. If it is a psychological or sociological study and you are reporting people’s use of profanity or slurs, then it should be okay. It would be important to make clear that these words could be offensive and are not the author’s words.

If you are reporting spoken words in a newspaper article, or the words of a provocative character in a novel that may be permitted. It is important to consider the context when choosing which words to use. You can also use euphemisms if you are really concerned.

Is that normal?

What if a writer refers to normal behaviour? Which infers anyone deviating from this is abnormal. Would I flinch to see someone whose brain works differently being described as weird, strange, or too much? Could I recognise that this is unhelpful and inaccurate? Some of the most neurodivergent people in the world are also some of the most creative and inspiring.

David Bowie and ADHD

David Bowie once said in an interview that if he’d been at school today, he would be labelled as having ADHD. Let’s face it, he did pretty well out of being different and following many ideas such as painting, acting, producing, and most successfully, performing and songwriting. Not all these activities succeeded, but I admire that he never limited himself and followed divergent passions.

If it’s good enough for a polymath like Bowie, perhaps we should all consider how we refer to those who differ from us and not other them.

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A short story workshop

Things We Do Not Tell The People We Love

We arrived in Bath in plenty of time for the short story workshop. Sun washed through the trees, and an excited buzz filled the air. This was the last day of the Bath Literary Festival, and the first time I had been to an event for six months.

My friend, Jools, bought me a ticket for a short story workshop with the award-winning writer, Huma Qureshi.

Persephone Books

We stepped through the entrance to Persephone Books and climbed the stairs emerging into a bright, white room. A squishy sofa sat in one corner and a stack of books jostled for space on a series of long tables. Excited chatter murmured through the group, and then Huma was introduced. Effortlessly attired in a prairie dress, she settled on the sofa and gave us an easy smile.

Huma Qureshi

A circle of chairs faced one another. Women outnumbered men fifteen to two. The atmosphere was inclusive and curious. Huma began to guide us with the eloquence and candour of a close friend.

The workshop

She put everyone at their ease immediately. In an hour and a half, she covered the most common issues of writing short stories.

Finding your voice

Finding your voice is a problem many emergent writers face. So far, I’ve tried (and failed) to write as Maggie O’ Farrell, Catriona Ward, and Marian Keyes. At university, I attempted a Virginia-Woolf-as-Mrs-Dalloway voice which ended in a reproachful tut from my tutor. Huma clarified finding your voice is about writing honestly. Many of us tend to overwrite and then edit. Another major issue is not being in the writing habit and writing every day.

Writing dialogue

I have a tin ear and cannot write dialogue which is ironic as I cannot stop talking: mine tends to be writerly which is not good. As Huma confirmed, “Speech that sounds like writing isn’t great dialogue.” Her advice? Sit in a cafe and observe strangers. Obviously, not in a creepy-stalkerish way. You need to listen and watch how someone’s words match how they move. Our bodies betray our true emotions even as our words deceive us.

Huma explained how a short story differs from the novel in the way they do not need to follow a narrative but are more like a glimpse through a window. Immediately, my mind was flickering through moments I could try to capture like fragments of a half-remembered dream.

Things We Do Not Tell The People We Love

I bought her collection of short stories: Things We Do Not Tell The People We Love, and I was thrilled with the inscription. The cover teases delicious intimacy. I read the first two stories as soon as I got home. This collection is personal, sensual, and devastating. All the pain of misunderstanding, the thrill of love in all its forms, and the restrictions our families place on us deliver in every word. Huma is an acute observer of the human condition and cares deeply. It shows.

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Everyone has one book in them, or do they?

Person writing with glasses
Someone writing at a table

So, everyone has one book in them, or do they? 2020 provided many with unexpected time on their hands. Those lucky enough to be furloughed found themselves without the worry of loss of income and with time. After endless lockdowns, life has now returned to something resembling the time before Covid, but not quite.

There is a lot of chatter online at the moment about how some people want to become time millionaires. So, some people are swapping a better-paid job for one with less income but more time.

Time to write that novel

Hours people spent commuting have, in some instances, been replaced with working from home. This has led to more time to pursue other interests outside work. One ambition many of us harbour is to write a book. But how realistic is it?

Writing groups and using social media

One way to help people connect with others who share their desire to write is to join a local group. There are many groups if you know where to look. You could start on social media or take the plunge and join a writers workshop or course.

Local arts centres for writing

If you search to find your local arts centre, there may be courses offering short story writing, novel writing, and the exciting world of flash fiction. Joining one of these groups could give you the motivation and discipline you need to get started on writing your novel.

Writing success from a writers group

Gail Honeyman’s Eleanor Oliphant is Completely Fine began life in a local writer’s group. Honeyman was a guest on Open Book a couple of years ago discussing how important her writing group became to the development of her novel.

When you want to write it can be daunting and many of us wonder if we are good enough? Do we have a distinct writer’s voice? Sometimes it can be hard to engage with other people even if they are supportive. If you want some help without meeting up with others there are options.

Free writing resources and inspiration

The National Centre for Writing has lots of free resources including renowned authors sharing their writing process including the excellent Eimer McBride. There’s also Reedsy and many others.

Writing can be lonely, but it doesn’t have to be. Take the plunge – you won’t regret it.

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Is it a memoir or an autobiography?

Image shows words on a page including memoir which is in bold
Definition of a memoir

Does it matter? What is the difference between autobiography and memoir? Autobiography is a record of an entire life, whereas a memoir is a snapshot or a series of incidents at a particular time.

Autobiography reveals the truth

Some literary figures argue only famous people can write autobiographies because there is greater interest in their stories. Often incidents and salacious details are known about a public figure before their book is released.

The main attraction in reading an autobiography by a public figure is to discover the truth behind the headlines and gossip. So an excellent marketing strategy is to release excerpts to the public to create a buzz to generate sales.

Memoir

Memoir is considered the poor relation to autobiography in certain circles. Some critics claim any individual can write a memoir which seems dismissive. But I’m not sure the distinction between autobiography and memoir is helpful or accurate.

Famous or infamous?

Keith Richard’s excellent autobiography Life was aided by the significant research and support of journalist James Fox. In interviews, Richards admitted that without Fox, the book would not have the level of authenticity it does.

Carrie Fisher’s Shockaholic is a more confessional memoir and better for her incredible wit and self-deprecating humour. There is something admirable about a woman willing to share the trauma of her mental illness and addiction so transparently. Fisher always remembers she has an audience. There is no self-pity party here.

Infamous

Pamela Des Barres’s I’m with the Band differs from the autobiographies of those previously mentioned. Whereas Keith Richards is famous for being a musician and Carrie Fisher for being an actor, writer, and entertainer, Pamela Des Barres had none of these attributes. Before famous-for-being-famous became commonplace, Des Barres was making a name for herself on the Sunset Strip.

A deep dive into the 1960s

The 1960s holds a romanticism and fascination for me bordering on the obsessive. If I lived during this time, I would have found all the changes in society shocking. Many women who lived through it, now say they feel they were exploited.

What makes Des Barres’s memoir fascinating is the reverence she holds for the time and her treatment by the rock royalty.

She was young, gorgeous, and at the epicenter of cultural change who happened to have relationships with some of the most famous figures in rock history.

Womens lives

I think memoir is often derided as it is, in my opinion, most beautifully written by women. It sometimes details the small, the domestic, and the personal. Of course, there is gossip and fun but what it really does is let other women know they are not alone with their fears and desires. Especially their desires!

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